The headline above refers to Deputy President Jacob Zuma, who is travelling the length and breadth of South Africa drumming up support for his bid for the top job.

Last week, he popped in on the Cosatu congress and, finding their Marxism-Leninism wanting, held an impromptu class on "the contradiction".

Said he: "There can be no progress without contradiction. Even as you walk, your legs are in contradiction. One goes forward and the other remains at the back and when the other one moves forward, the other remains."

This from a man with one foot in the presidency and the other in the frying pan.

With acknowledgements to Hogarth and the Sunday Times.